Yesterday marks two years that me and the Beau has been together. It feels like we’ve been together for way longer than just two years. I feel like we’ve been together for a life time already. I suppose that’s a good thing too?

We celebrated by going to Denali for a rafting trip, then swinging by 49th State Brewery for Alaskan brewed beer and food. Unfortunately, no pictures. I didn’t take a camera or my phone with me on the river (a little paranoid about losing it), but you can imagine in your head how pretty it was to see the tail end of the park, going through canyons and running through class III and class IV rapids. It was a guided tour, so we didn’t have to work too much for it, but admittedly, I’m feeling pretty sore today from bracing myself in the raft.

Things are good though and for once I feel like I can see a light at the end of the tunnel, or more like I’m at the entrance and things seem to be going better for once for me. Sold the house at the beginning of this month. Realized I was using a dentist outside of my network and by switching to an in network dentist, I am no longer going to be physically hurting from paying for the cost of my rogue tooth. I feel secure and like I’ve made progress in several fronts enough that I could buy myself a new computer desk, finally, so I can get rid of the one that has some bad memories attached to it. I actually, honestly, feel like I’m finally in control of my life again. Like my decisions are my own and I’m no longer being restrained by past actions that felt like my hands were continually tied together.

Work is even going good. Got an 8 hour leave reward (even though I couldn’t attend the meeting for it) and I’m starting to win allies over to my side of the world every time an old timey engineer tries to bully me up the street (I earned myself the name “Project Killer” earlier this month because they failed to do their due diligence and review all aspects of their project which had a significantly big environmental impact). Same dude tried to tell me what my job was through email earlier this week. A different party stepped in before I sent a scathing email back. While yes, I am the technical expert, it’s not my job to write your scope of work or tell you how to bill for something. And I’m definitely not going to go out of my way to help you when you’re whining at me about knocking your project off schedule because you failed to realize you were digging in known contaminated media.

I love my life. I love my job and I totally didn’t mean to get off on that tangent. The truth of the matter is that I’m happy and I don’t know if I’ve ever been able to write that without it feeling force or a lie I kept trying to tell myself.

And that’s a wonderful feeling to realize.

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